These days are largely behind us now (thank God) but every now and again they creep back up on us and I’m reminded of THIS. Hang in there. It does get better. Until then, here’s 10 things you can do…
1. Cry. It’s ok to mourn the sleep you so desperately miss.
2. Calculate your baby’s value on eBay. Do NOT mention sleeping ability.
3. Curse all the neighbours whose houses are in complete darkness.
4. Curse your other half. Prod them. Stick things in their ears. And up their nose.
5. If that doesn’t rouse them, slam doors.
6. Check Facebook and Twitter repeatedly and connect with other insomniac parents.
7. Spend a ton of money, online shopping, for things you don’t need (and things you’ll forgot you even ordered, until they turn up).
8. Eat breakfast. At 5.00 AM. At least you’re getting ahead of the day, right?
9. Remember AND laugh at all the things you thought you’d ‘achieve’ on maternity leave. With all that time you were finally going to have. (Clean pants are an achievement these days.)
10. Nod off. Wake up in a pool of dribble. Drink coffee. Repeat. For the rest of time. YAWN.