The other day, a first time mum-to-be commented (very nicely) that she found my blog (and other mummy blogs) utterly terrifying. She said she was finding it hard to find anything positive about motherhood online. And whilst I’ve read plenty of positive articles about birth and motherhood, the trend to be honest, means it probably IS a bit terrifying when you’re still on the other side. So I thought I’d write something utterly positive. For all those mums-to-be I’ve terrified (sorry about that, jaded mum of three here).
- There is NO day like the day you get through labour and meet your baby. Imagine that post-exercise high then multiply it by about a million. You’ve run the equivalent of a marathon. And you’ve survived. No matter how your labour went or how you delivered, this day will be spent marvelling at that teeny, tiny human being that YOU made. Eating toast and drinking tea. THAT shower. Sharing the arrival of your new addition. And feeling so relieved that both you and baby are safe. You’ll feel on top of the world, despite the after pains of labour and being completely knackered. Nothing can knock you off your perch. This is how insanely euphoric that first day is. It’s the reason so many of us keep having kids, I’m sure. To experience that incredible day all over again. Nothing I’ve experienced before or since has compared. Or even come close.
- You’ll finally understand the meaning of unconditional love. 24 hours before giving birth you’ll wonder what your baby will look like. You’ll wonder if you’ll love them. What that love will even feel like. Then they are born, you look into their cloudy little eyes and everything falls into place (even if this doesn’t happen immediately, it does happen. At some point). Forever after.
- You’ll no longer be pregnant. Even if you enjoyed pregnancy, the chances are that some 40 weeks later you’re feeling a bit over it. Once you’ve popped, even though your uterus will be a couple of weeks away from its pre-pregnancy size and your tummy will have a longer way to go (no dieting please), it’s so nice to be able to see your toes again.
- Brie and wine. See above. Even if you’ve never liked brie, you’ll probably find yourself eating it. Just because you can.
- You will turn into a goddess, overnight. You might not feel like one but you will be one in the eyes of others, as people visit and coo over you and your baby. Revel in this. You deserve it. You’re amazing.
- Babies bring hope, to everyone. No matter what else is happening on the planet, babies have the power to temporarily halt all the desperation and sadness and restore our faith in human nature. Not just because they’re so darn cute but also because they are brand new and have a whole, promising, unadulterated future ahead of them.
- You will finally learn who you are. Becoming a mother changes you. For the better. You become a more empathetic human being, you discover skills you never realised you had, like patience and the ability to nurture someone before yourself. And you realise you have these in abundance.
- The rush of love every time you look at your baby never ends. Even at 3.00 AM when you’re knackered and would much rather be asleep, your baby has the ability to make you smile and feel fuzzy inside. (Note: If you’re not feeling this and instead you’re feeling utterly overwhelmed, tearful or exhausted, or not that in love with your baby yet, please don’t worry. Be kind to yourself and even more patient and always talk to someone – a friend or a friendly health professional – if you need reassurance).
- It really does go quick. The biggest cliche in the book, that they grow up so quickly, isn’t a cliche at all. It’s the truth. I have a 2, 4 and 6 year old to prove this. And yet I’m sure I only started this whole motherhood business yesterday.
- Having a baby is the most amazing thing you’ll do and it will be your biggest achievement, ever. And there won’t be a day that goes by where you won’t feel this. THIS is what keeps you going. THIS is the magic of motherhood.
And you’re going to rock it.